Winning the Lottery

I must be the luckiest man alive. In the past year I have won $95,015,643 in 49 lotteries.

You might think that this explains my lackadaisical attitude as I flip open my silver Dupont cigarette lighter and ponder the subject for another piece of journalism. Or should I have a go at another draft of my novel?

(The Dupont is the one that goes ping when you flip the top open. It is the most beautiful sound in the world – but that is a subject for another article.)

My attitude is real. I am that way, blessed with a zen sense of non-urgency. Alas, my winnings exist only on paper.

To be more precise, I have received 49 e-mail notices telling me that I have won this money. When I try to collect any of it, a strange thing happens. Invariably I get another notice that I have to send money to an agent who will secure the release of these funds. It’s all very complicated. European banking rules and currency regulations etc. Blah blah. The point is that I have to send them money.

I am being enticed through the looking glass into the wonderful world of internet fraud.

It begins when you receive an e-mail like this:


From: “NATIONAL LOTTERY” uklottery@thecricket.co.za
Subject: YOU ARE A WINNER

THE NATIONAL LOTTERY P O BOX 1010LIVERPOOL, L70 1NLUNITED KINGDOM(Customer Services)Ref: UK/9420X7/97Batch: 074/06/ZYY02 BTL NOTIFICATION DESKWe happily announce to you the draw (#1057) of the UK NATIONAL LOTTERY, online Sweepstakes International program. Your e-mail address attached to ticket number:73495600545 100 with Serial number 7374/02 drew the lucky numbers: 09 27 28 31 41 42 bonus number 25, which subsequently won you the lottery in the 2nd category i.e. match 5 plus bonus.You have therefore been approved to claim a total sum of £281,274(Two hundred and eighty One thousand Two Hundred and Seventy Four pounds sterling) in cash credited to file KTU/7349111002/06. This is from a total cash prize of £843,822 shared amongst the (3) lucky winners in this category i.e. Match 5 plus bonus. All participants for the online version were selected randomly from World Wide Web sites through computer draw system and extracted from over 100,000 unions, individuals, associations, and corporate bodies that are listed online. This promotion takes place weekly. Please note that your lucky winning number falls within our European booklet representative office in Europe and your paying bank will be from our African Representative as indicated in your play coupon. In view of this, your £281,274(Two hundred and eighty One thousand Two Hundred and Seventy Four pounds sterling) would be released to you by our representing bank in South Africa upon clearance and clarification from our payment offices in Europe. Our European agent will immediately commence the process to facilitate the release of your funds as soon as you contact him. For security reasons, you are advised to keep your winning information confidential till your claims is processed and your money remitted to you in whatever manner you deem fit to claim your prize. This is part of our precautionary measure to avoid double claiming and unwarranted abuse of this program. Please be Warned!!!: Fraudulent emails are circulating that appear to be using National Lottery addresses, but are not from The National Lottery.PLEASE REPORT IMMEDIATELY TO : CUSTOMER CARE/COMPLAINTS:DEPT:customercare_desk@yahoo.co.ukPlease be warned. To file for your claim, please contact our fiduciary agent with the filled verification form.Mr HENRY COLE.Direct Email: agenthenrycole@yahoo.co.uk Phone Number: +447031870750 Yours faithfully,Mr.Richard Bricks Online coordinator for THE NATIONAL LOTTERY Sweepstakes International Program.



The warning about fraudulent e-mails is a nice touch. These lottery notices seem to emanate mainly from the UK, Spain, and the Netherlands. On closer inspection you may find lurking behind them an e-mail address in South America, Russia, Italy, or (as in this case) Africa.

If you respond and try to collect your prize you will receive a claim form and a declaration very like the one that follows. Ping. Let’s welcome gallant little Thailand to the ranks of internet scammers!


CLAIMANT SIGNATORY DECLARATIONI ..................................... Declare as thelotto prizeWinner that all information I have provided for mywinning claims are true and correct information ofmyself. I agree with THE NATIONAL LOTTERY policy andregulation in line with my lottery claims.==================================================Please indicate "X" for the option you want your prizeto be remitted to you.Listed below is our payment modalities and option ofpayment.(1) TRAVELLING TO ANY OF OUR PAYMENT CENTRE FOR PRIZECOLLECTION: […………](2) BY COURIER DELIVERY OF YOUR PRIZE CHEQUE: […………](3) TELEGRAPHIC TRANSFER INTO YOUR DESINATED BANKACCOUNT------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------You are advice to fill the above cliams form and sendback with to me immediately.Thanks. Regards,ERICK DORAY,(CLAIMS AGENT)Take note of my private email addressclaimsagenterick1@yahoo.co.th henceforth send me theFill Application Form and further email to the emailaddress from now on.


If you pursue your claim further you will receive the coup de grace:


This is to acknowledge the receipt of your fill Claimsform A.I write in respect of your Claim Form (A) with regardsto the transfer of your lottery prize money payment.Toenable me proceed with the documentation andprocurement of your fund release documents from theconcerns offices. I have to notarize Your Claims Form(A) at the Thai court in order to make the filledCliams Form (A) a legal instrument as stipulated by HMinline with the national lottery payment procedures.To enable me get your Claims Form (A) notarized youare required to send $200 and to procure all yourwinning claim release documents from concerns offices,you are required to pay $550 so for the cost ofnotarization/procurements of your release documents itcost the sum of US$750This payment has to be made at the court registry toobtain the stamp Duty fees and have your Claims Form(A) certified by the court to enable me proceed withthe procedures to be taken for the immediate releaseof your winning money.You are required to send this money the sum of US$750 through my Account Officer NAME: PAGSISINAN JACQUELYNADDRESS: BANGKOK THAILANDThis payment has to be made immediately to enable meproceed with the release of your winning claim withoutany delay. Please arrange the payment of the US$750 (SevenHundred And Fifty United State Dollars Only) and sendit to the name of my Account Officer PAGSISINANJACQUELYN through Western Union Money Transfer Unitimmediately to facilitate the procedures to be takenin order to have all the documents signed and for theNational Lottery release your money.Once you send the fees by western union, forward themoney transfer tracking number immediately via theemail address. Thanks.Yours truly,Erick Doray



$750? Western Union? If you send this money you will never hear from them again. The game is over. You have been conned.

Erick, or Jacquelyn, is modest in his/her aim to part you from your money. Another scammer has asked me to send $15,000 to an agent in Amsterdam.

Do not be tempted, my friends. Some of these lotteries pretend to be linked to Microsoft or Hewlett Packard. One claims to be associated with the estate of Princess Diana. They are all fake.

Be warned. One day the internet will be a safe place. It is not safe now. The crooks are swarming all over it. They are ingenious and persistent.

My “winnings” are no more than a veil of smoke floating in cyberspace. But I have kept the notices and like to read them sometimes. It’s grand to dream.

Ping. Back to the novel.